09 July 2011

This song is the reason I came to BYU-Idaho for college.

It was a humid Sunday night in July. The fireflies were out. The cicadas were singing. And I was crying.

I had just left my friend's house where some people were over to play games. While I was there, the stress of leaving my family, starting college, and saying goodbye to one of my best friends hit full force. I had went outside on the porch to think and started crying. Eventually, other people came out and gave me hugs and asked me what was wrong. I avoided giving a completely honest answer and said that I was just sad to say goodbye.

On the drive home, I was so absorbed in my thoughts that I wasn't paying attention to the free sampler CD I had gotten at Warped Tour a few days before. I pulled into my dad's driveway, not wanting to go into the house and have my dad ask me what was wrong.
I sat in my car feeling so stressed out and confused. I knew it was good to go to college, but I was so worried to leave behind a family that relied on me so much. Then this song came on and for some reason I started listening. As I paid attention to the lyrics, I started crying even harder. "There’s no reason to be afraid/Though I know that you are/You’re just scared of the changes/That could fix your life" were the lines that really hit home.
And that's when I knew. Heavenly Father wanted me to go to BYU-Idaho. Not just because I was supposed to get an education, but because it was a place that could really help me as a person.
And it has. I have healed so much here. I have grown so much here. I have learned so much here. And even though I've really hated it at times, I know this was where I was supposed to be for the last four years.

I'm grateful that Heavenly Father speaks to us in so many ways. He knew how important music was to me at that time and He knew that He could talk to me through it and I would listen.
I'm grateful that He can see the Big Picture and that He puts me in situations that will help me prepare for future events in my life.

"Your life is carefully watched over, as was mine.  
The Lord knows both what He will need you to 
do and what you will need to know.  He is kind 
and He is all-knowing.  So, you can with confidence 
expect that He has prepared opportunities for you to 
learn in preparation for the service you will give."
--Henry B. Eyring via this devotional

1 comment:

  1. These are really beautiful thoughts. Even though I feel like 90% of the time I don't know why things happen in my life the way they do, I have faith that He does.